Word count: 971
Disclaimer: I don't own Stargate: Atlantis.
Summary: Radek and Evan come to an understanding about their respective bosses. Lorne Fest prompt: Lorne, Zelenka - Looking after their bosses, conversation (verbal or non).
“I need a goddamned drink.”
Radek looked up from his datapad to see Major Lorne slumped into one of the couches of the other side of the recreation room. He looked – well, as exhausted as Radek felt. He was leaning into the couch as if he could no longer hold himself upright without its support, his head on the arm, one hand over his face.
“A drink, Major?” Radek asked, and Major Lorne jumped.
“Oh, Doc, hey,” he said, looking across the room at him. “I was just – sorry. I didn’t know you were in here.”
“It is no problem,” Radek said. “I did not mean to startle you.”
Major Lorne gave him a tired smile. “An elephant could sneak up on me right now, Doc,” he said mildly. “Don’t worry about it.”
Silence settled, and Radek shifted, uncomfortable. “Is something on your mind, Major?” he asked after a few minutes.
The other man smiled. “Evan,” he offered. “Please. It would be nice to have someone around here who actually knows my name. And uses it,” he added, a weary look on his face.
“Radek,” he said in return. “I am certain that most of the Marines do not know which of my names is given and which is family.”
Major Lorne – Evan – gave him another smile. “Could be worse,” he said. “Most of the Marines think I don’t have a soul.”
Radek blinked. “I assume that to be an unfair assumption, yes?”
Evan laughed out loud. “Hope so,” he said. “Sheppard –” And he sighed in frustration again, sliding his eyes to Radek. “I don’t want to rant.” He sounded hopeful, as if waiting for an invitation. Radek made a show of putting his datapad down and turning to Evan, who took the actions at face value and resumed.
“Sheppard and his team nearly got themselves blown to pieces again today,” he said, in that same tired voice. Radek nodded; this was hardly news to him. Evan shook his head. “But you work with McKay, so I’m sure you’ve already heard.”
“Doctor McKay was… displeased this afternoon,” Radek acknowledged. “He said something about ‘stupid ideas’ and ‘unintelligent, football-loving hippies.’” He blinked. “I assumed he was talking about Colonel Sheppard, but to be honest, I did not really want to hear the story. His skin was still green and he looked rather sour.”
Evan blew out a breath. “Yeah, well, Sheppard came back muttering about the stupidity of geniuses and mentioned packing tranq darts as a regular part of the med kits. I don’t think it went too well.”
“I would have to agree with you,” Radek said. “Do you know what happened?”
Evan shrugged. “Official mission reports aren’t due in until tomorrow, but I sat with Teyla and Ronon at dinner. They told me Sheppard and McKay had some sort of disagreement about the locals, things got out of hand, and said locals decided to…” He waved a hand, apparently unable to come up with a suitable word. “Punish them.”
“By turning them strange colors,” Radek supposed. Rodney had come back a spectacular shade of green, and if the reports were to be believed, Colonel Sheppard was bright orange. “What sort of disagreement?”
“Apparently, Rodney wanted Sheppard to blow up the barrier that they’d put around the Ancient device,” Evan replied. “Sheppard wanted to let Teyla try to talk to them first. They argued. Loudly. And then they were crayons.”
Radek snorted. “If they were crayons, Rodney would be the neon green one that hurts your eyes when you look at it.”
Evan grinned. “Sheppard would be macaroni and cheese. Not the real kind, but the kind you get out of a box. My nephew tells me they have a crayon that color now.”
They both smiled as Radek asked, “Has Dr. Keller made any progress into turning them back?”
Evan shrugged. “It’s supposed to wear off in a few days. She’s not worried, says to let them be, that it might do them good to live with it.” He paused. “They were… a little less than pleased to hear that analysis.”
Radek nodded. “I will be sure to spend the next few days antagonizing Rodney, then.” He smiled a little at Evan’s look. “It keeps him focused on screaming at me, instead of abusing the others.” He shrugged. “I am used to it. It is almost fuel for the fire by now, yes?”
Evan’s eyes lit in agreement as he leaned back into the couch. “I hear you,” he said. “I’ll be spending the next few days doing some extra sparring myself. Also, I’m gonna have find some way to keep the Marines from calling him The Thing, because I’m pretty sure he’d snap and wring a neck or two.”
“That would not end well,” Radek observed. He stood, gathering his datapad. “I think that I will make my way back to the labs. Rodney was in there when I left, and I would like to be sure he does not attempt to blow anything up.”
“Good luck,” Evan said from somewhere in the cushions. “I’m going to sleep.”
“Here?” Radek blinked, looking around.
“Got my comm on if anyone needs me,” he replied. “Hey, Doc – Radek,” he amended. “Thanks.”
“It is no problem,” Radek replied as he stood in the doorway. “If you need to do this… rant… again, I am available. Perhaps, between the two of us, we can keep them from killing us all.”
“Maybe,” Evan said with a laugh. “Jury’s still out.”
Radek smiled and shook his head as he shut the lights off and closed the door. After a moment, he keyed in the codes that would keep the door locked except in the case of an emergency. It would not do to have his new ally disturbed before he got a little rest.